© Lynne Hall and Alison France 2005-2019        All rights reserved        Last updated 03/04/2019           Privacy Policy

Only 208 days until Christmas...............................................

The News

Evangelist Roger Hillis gave two talks at a local church in the USA.  The morning service included a talk called “Preparing for Marriage” while the afternoon one was “A Look at Hell”.  Many people attended both.  

A local official in Springfield, Illinois, has denied lying about a financial transaction he completed.  He has, however, admitted that he did not tell the truth either.

Big news from Appleton in Wisconsin. “Appleton Airport may soon be known as Appleton Airport.” No doubt the meeting to decide that lasted a very long time.  

In Ottawa, a woman joined a huge search party, only to discover some hours later that it was actually her that everyone was looking for!

The “We’ve Been There” Section - Alwinton, Northumberland

Another Happy Mams’ Day wish to our Mams!!!!

A couple of happy memories shown below!

Shivviness - An old Yorkshire word for that weird clingy feeling you get from some clothes.

Croochie-proochles - The way you feel when you’ve been sitting somewhere for too long and your legs no longer work.

Flapdoodle - something said that sounds ridiculous (just think about Trump!)

Ishkabibble - from the Yiddish - means “why should I worry” or “what a lot of ………”

Gobemouche - someone naïve or gullible.

Humdudgeon - when you can’t be bothered - “I’ve got a case of humdudgeon so I can’t come.”

Coddiwomple - when you just don’t know what to do next - “I don’t know what to do next so I’ll just coddiwomple for a while”.  It’s from Old English.  

Gwenders - something like pins and needles.

Ninnyhammer - someone not very bright - I can think of a few!

Quafftide  - that time of day when you can have a drink - like happy hour!

Ever been lost for words?  Try these out!!!!

This last picture by Uncle Eric.

American Towns

After the problem last edition of the man who didn’t know how an American town got its name, here are a few more he might like to consider (all actually exist)-

Possum Grape, Arkansas

No Name, Colorado

Happyland, Connecticut

Experiment, Georgia

Good Grief, Idaho

Santa Claus, Indiana

Kickapoo, Kansas

Hell, Michigan

Worms, Nebraska

Sugar Bunker, Nevada

Cheesequake, New Jersey

Pee Pee Ohio

Eggnog, Utah

Humptulips, Washington

Imalone, Wisconsin

Tee Hee!

Proof Reading

A very important job and, obviously, there must be shortage of proof readers.  These are genuine!

“The bridal couple stood facing the floral setting and exchanged cows”

“It took rabbits many years to write the Talmud.”

Mrs. (Blank) fell downstairs at her home this morning, breaking her myhodudududududududosy, and suffered painful injuries.”

And as for commonsense….

What about these signs?

April Anniversaries

1805 - Hans Christian Anderson was born.

1860 - The beginning of the Pony Express.

1949 - NATO was founded.

1896 - The first modern Olympics were held.

1970 - Apollo 13 was launched.

1961 - Yuri Gagarin became the first human in space.

1865 - Abraham Lincoln assassinated.

1889 - Charlie Chaplin born in London.

1906 - The San Francisco Earthquake struck.

1775 - The first shots of the American Revolution were fired (although our Jonathan Boucher always called it the Civil War!)

And - on the 23rd April ……..

1564 - William Shakespeare was born

1791 - James Buchanan (American President) was born

Every Year - It’s Lynne’s Half Birthday!!!!

Congratulations to all our Ernie winners!!!!

Berrystead Nursery

Your favourite gardeners have been busy today!

It really is time to end this equality thing!  Whatever happened to the men who used to think we were pathetic little women and offer to take them around the back for us???!!!!  

Special Offer!!!!!  For Sale!!!

For the first reasonable offer - two slightly used pallets - only two careful lady owners.

Think of all you could do with them - make your own furniture, use them as a sunbed, manage to reach a little higher by standing on them, sculpt a garden feature ………. the possibilities are endless.

Apply now to MucKbusters while stocks last!

The Wonderful Photo Spot

While searching for pictures of Spitalfields today I came across this wonderful photo.  Can’t help but wonder who the little lad was.

Phew, I’m knackered!!!